People like to help those they see are showing signs of promise.
If you are looking for a mentor, start by finding someone you click with, who shares the same values, and has the experience you want to tap into. But before you ask for their guidance, demonstrate how you can help them.
It may sound umcomfortable to give someone more experienced or knowledgeable some of your tips, but everyone has something they can learn and improve upon, and true high achievers are open to learning from anyone and everyone around them.
Perhaps you can teach your future mentor something new, show them how to leverage social media for their work or automate processes they’ve been doing manually for decades.
The relationship between mentor and mentee is a two-way street, and being a standout mentee requires effort, commitment, and reciprocity. As someone who has dedicated my career to studying and fostering mentoring relationships, I’ve seen firsthand how standout mentees can attract and retain the best mentors. Here are eleven ways to become the person everyone wants to take under their wing and guide, complete with specific actions you can take.
Show Genuine Interest and Commitment
When your mentor suggests reading a book or attending a webinar, follow through and discuss your takeaways during your next meeting. Did you like it? Agree with it? If not, why? This shows that you value their recommendations and are serious about your growth. It’s okay to disagree, as long as you can back it up by showing you thought about it seriously, and weighed all options.
Be Open to Feedback
If your mentor points out that you need to improve your presentation skills, seek out resources or workshops to enhance this area. At your next meeting, share what you’ve learned and how you’ve applied it, demonstrating your willingness to not just hear the feedback, but act on it. Read my Forbes article on turning feedback into an opportunity for enhancement.
Set Clear Goals
At the beginning of the mentoring relationship, outline your career aspirations, such as aiming for a leadership position within three years. Work with your mentor to create a roadmap with specific milestones, like completing a relevant certification or leading a project.
Be Proactive
Instead of waiting for your mentor to suggest networking opportunities, identify relevant industry events and ask your mentor for their opinion on which ones would be most beneficial. Don’t be afraid to ask for an introduction to anyone they think would be beneficial for you to meet. This shows your initiative to grow your network thoughtfully.
Cultivate a Growth Mindset
If you encounter a setback, such as not getting a promotion, discuss what you can learn from the experience and how to improve for the future. Show your mentor that you view challenges as opportunities to develop further.
Show Appreciation
After each mentoring session, send a follow-up email thanking your mentor for their time and summarizing the key points you discussed. Highlight how their advice has been helpful and what actions you plan to take next.
Be Respectful of Their Time
If your mentor has a busy schedule, be flexible with your meeting times and make the most out of each session by letting them know in advance what you would like to discuss. This shows that you respect their time and are committed to making each interaction productive.
Demonstrate Progress
Keep a journal of your professional achievements and regularly share updates with your mentor. For instance, if you successfully implement a strategy they recommended, let them know how it benefited your work and the outcomes achieved. The best mentors measure their success by the achievements of their mentees. So don’t be afraid to share with them the projects you’ve completed, awards won, or presentations made. They’ll be beaming with pride knowing they had a small part to play in your success. Be sure to thank your mentor for their help in preparing you for those achievements.
Build a Personal Connection
Share personal stories or hobbies that you are passionate about. If your mentor enjoys hiking and you do too, discussing a recent hiking trip can help build rapport and make your conversations more engaging and enjoyable. If you aren’t sure how to start a conversation with someone you are getting to know, consider reading my Forbes article which has many conversation starters.
Reverse Mentoring
Offer your mentor help with areas where you might have more knowledge or experience. For example, if you have strong digital skills, offer to assist your mentor with social media strategies or using new software tools. This reciprocity not only adds value to your mentor but also strengthens the bond between you.
Be a Good Listener
During mentoring sessions, give your mentor your undivided attention. Avoid interrupting, and after they’ve spoken, summarize what you’ve heard to ensure you’ve understood correctly. Ask follow-up questions that show you’ve been actively listening and are eager to learn more.
Becoming a standout mentee is about more than just absorbing knowledge—it’s about building a relationship based on mutual respect, growth, and commitment. By embodying these eleven qualities and implementing these specific actions, you can attract and retain exceptional mentors who are eager to help you reach your full potential. Remember, the best mentoring relationships are those where both mentor and mentee are inspired and enriched by their journey together.